


Best clexa story ever

by clexatrash_af



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: 100 percent pure premium grade crack, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-27
Updated: 2015-06-27
Packaged: 2018-04-06 11:33:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4220133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clexatrash_af/pseuds/clexatrash_af
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Self-explanatory title. This is definitively the best clexa story ever, in the history of this fandom. </p><p>Crack <strike>fic</strike> cocaine. Yes, you can snort this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Best clexa story ever

**Author's Note:**

> No, I am not drunk/high.

Clarke Griffin is sad after breaking up with her asshole cheating boyfriend Finn, who is an asshole. She is sad until she meets an insanely hot brunette (who is not to be mistaken for a racoon) with green eyes because they are soulmates and not that other bellaboloo crap.

They gaze gazingly at each other before Clarke speaks up.

“Hello, I’m Clarke,” she says, looking into eyes that shift between grey (all fifty shades ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) and green that remind her of the forest/grass/minty fresh dishwashing liquid. “Griffin.”

“I’m Lexa Woods/Heda/et cetera et cetera,” replies the other girl, who is thinking about how blue Clarke’s eyes are. They are so blue, like the liquid they often use in maxipad commercials. Woah. _How does she even see other colors with eyes that blue?!_ Wow, such blue, much cerulean, very azure.

Just like that, they fall in love at the very first sight.

“I want to draw you,” Clarke requests, because she is an artist/doctor/med student who loves art. “Possibly naked.”

Lexa blushes, but she agrees anyway.

So they go back to Clarke’s apartment where Lexa takes off all her clothes. They stare at each other.

There is a lot of unresolved sexual tension in the air.

Clarke paints Lexa, who is permanently chugging a water bottle because she is so **_t h i r s t y._**

The painting is finished in less than five seconds because Clarke is literally Picasso.

“Oh my God,” Lexa breathes breathily, expertly converting oxygen to carbon dioxide. “You are so talented,” she says, looking at the magnificent stick figure _masterpiece_ in front of her (mega, super duper, earth-shattering) green eyes.

Clarke blushes, grabbing a nearby water bottle, because she, too, is desperately in need of hydration.

They can’t stand it anymore, pulling each other in for a kiss, their tongues fiercely **_battling for dominance_** ~~like two MMA fighters~~.

They have crazy, gravity-defying, wild monkey sex, sometimes in physically dubious positions, in Clarke’s room. Needless to say, they won’t be needing those water bottles anymore ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)

Afterwards, they break up because of some arbitrary angsty issue that is very angsty.

Clarke can no longer paint anything because of this. It's very very sad.

“We cannot be together!” Lexa exclaims, throwing her hands up in the air in frustration, thinking about the angsty issue.

“Yes you can, you idiot,” says Anya stoically, Lexa’s big sister/cousin/sometimes boss, slapping some sense into her (but not in the violent way). 

“Yes, I can,” agrees Lexa, suddenly having an epiphany that the angsty issue is actually a non-issue!

She runs to Clarke’s apartment, and they make up ~~and makeout~~. Everyone woops and cheers.

In the corner, Lincoln smiles muscularly.

“Hand the money over, bitches!” Raven (who is the prettiest broom in a closet full of brooms) yells.

“Fuck this shit,” says Octavia (who is a cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure).

They lived happily ever after.

**Author's Note:**

> Bonus: 
> 
> Clerk and ~~a racoon~~ Lexeh wer walkin to Polis 2gethr. Clerk sed: "kermandr, will u luv me 4ever?" to which Lexeh replied... "NO". 
> 
> Clerk cryed n ran across da 4rest when she got shot by sum1 in Mt Wethr.
> 
>  ~~The racoon~~ Lexeh was cryin and went to pic up her body. She was DED.
> 
> Lexeh whispered to Clerk's corpse, "I ment 2 sey i will luv u...FIVE-ever."
> 
> (dat mean she love her moar den FOUR-ever)
> 
> ~~** kudos dis if u cri EVERy tIME...~~ (ignore if you're LITERALLY SATAN)
> 
>  
> 
> [tumblr here](http://a-wild-clone-clubber.tumblr.com/)


End file.
